My Experiences in a Controlling Cult

 

What is cult mind control and why should we be concerned about it? A cult is a group of people with extreme dedication to a leader or set of beliefs. There are the more obvious cults like the Moonies and the Hare Krishnas.  You may think that you would never fall for something that silly. But there are many cults that appear as conventional religious, therapeutic, business, or philanthropic groups. Many of them use covert manipulation to gain recruits and control their members.  If you aren’t aware of this, you are vulnerable.

How does cult mind control work? The purpose of cult mind control is to get you to drop your reliance on your own judgement and depend on the doctrines of the cult or the authority of its leader. This is done in order to make you a tool for the cult’s use.  Cults try to manipulate you in many ways. For example, by bombarding you with loving attention, by playing on your idealism, your fears, your pride, or your greed. All the while presenting a benign front and hiding their true agenda

Cults often use a three-step indoctrination process

Step 1: Unfreezing: The purpose of this is to disorient you to get you to doubt your present identity and world view by removing you from your accustomed environment and bombarding you with new intense experiences while not allowing you time to reflect on what is happening to you. You become unsure of who you are and what you believe.

Step 2: Changing: They attempt to instill in you a new identity and world view by constantly exposing you to their dogma while isolating you from outside information.

Step 3: Refreezing: They then solidify your new identity to get you to define who you are according group’s doctrines.  This is often done by involving you in constant group activities.  What you do becomes who you are.

I have personally experienced being in a controlling cult. It began when I read one of a cult leader’s books. I thought that he was very wise. I attended some of his lectures. He was charismatic too. I was so impressed that I quit my job and moved to the town where the cult was based.

My initial experiences were good.  It was like a church, with weekly talks by the leader, fund raising and social events. The group members were friendly and there were opportunities to do volunteer work. The leader’s doctrine provided me meaning in life, I was part of a supportive community, and I had work to do that made me feel that I was “saving the world.” To tell you the truth those were happy days.

But then some things began to bother me. I noticed that the group members deified the leader: He was the source of The Truth. We studied his books and listened to his lectures as if they were scripture. He could do no wrong.  The leader denigrated our personal judgment. We were told how secretly evil and deceptive we were. He played upon our pride telling us we were in a special group that possessed knowledge no one else had. He played upon our fears by portraying the world outside the group as threatening, telling us it wanted to cheat us out of our salvation and we should have nothing to do with it. This included our family and old friends.

Even though I was deeply involved in group I still had enough presence of mind to notice that something that they were doing was wrong. They were raising money by giving the impression that they were helping the poor when in fact they did not. I wrote to the leader saying that we could fix this by including in our appeals for donations a description of what the proceeds would be actually used for. He ignored my message.  So, our leader wasn’t so ethical after all, and he didn’t even have the decency to acknowledge my message.

I stopped participating in the fundraising activities because I thought they were unethical but I couldn’t bring myself to leave the group. Then I accidentally discovered the book, Combating Cult Mind Control, by Stephan Hassan.  He details how controlling cults work. As I read my eyes opened. This was what was going on all around me. Still it took considerable inner struggle to leave the group. It was my life and I trusted and admired the group’s members. And I seriously doubted my own judgement.

Finally, I thought “Everyone must decide what is true for themselves. And God won’t fault me for making an honest mistake.” So, I left the group entirely. It was one the most important decisions I have ever made. I left quietly by simply not showing up. The reaction of the group was shocking. Suddenly no one would speak with me. This was in a small town and I would often meet group members on the street. People who I thought were my friends would simply walk away from me as if they had orders to do so.

But what really nailed it was what happened next. I was working at my job at a restaurant when the manager [one of the group members] said there was someone there to see me. It was one of the senior members of the cult. He was a retired doctor who had moved from Scotland to be part of the group. Scottish people can be pretty fierce. As we sat at a table he looked at me sternly and said, “If you leave our group you are doomed! Doomed!”  I was completely blown away by this and didn’t know what to say. Then, remembering my experience from 12 step groups, I replied “Thanks for sharing.” His face turned red.  He stood up and stomped out. 

Whether it was just good luck that I found the book Combating Cult Mind Control or if that was an answer to my parent’s prayers, I don’t know. But if I hadn’t found that book, I might still be in that cult today.  It was a close call and so I feel obliged to share this information with you.